Tuesday, November 30, 2010

the parrot ate my stick

I am truly insane, I actually peed on a stick today!  I mean how sick is that, one day after transfer?  I just seem to be going through the motions like a robot, and don't feel in control of my own actions.  I don't know what the stick actually said, because the parrot ate the bottom half and destroyed the reagent, making me aware that I am an idiot in the process.  I think it was negative, although if I try really hard I can see lines on anything.  MrH said he saw "sweet blue bugger all", so I think we'll call it a negative-eaten-by-the-parrot.

I am doing it also because I want to give myself permission to do whatever the heck my mind wants to do, as in the past I have fought hard to stop myself from doing pregnancy tests and felt bad when I failed.  Let's just hope that the mind has a wisdom of its own, and rather go with that, as whatever you resist tends to persist anyway.

I am so incredibly sleepy from the progesterone.  I slept from when I came back from work until 9 pm, when MrH had to work hard to wake me up from my sweaty heavy coma.  I woke up reluctantly, ate, took my meds, brushed my teeth, wrote my blog (i.e. the essentials :) and will go back to sleep again.  If I could sleep through the next week I would.

3 comments:

  1. Sorry I've been a bit behind and am catching up on blogs tonight. So glad to hear the transfer went well...ugh, the full bladder, I'm SO not looking forward to that part tomorrow, I had a similar situation during our last transfer.
    Good for you for allowing yourself to feel and do whatever is right for you in this moment. I remember the days of the sleepy haze...rest, relax all that you desire. Sending so much love, hope and positive vibes your way ((hugs))

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  2. You crack me up! I'll keep my fingers crossed and send good vibes out to you! I'll e-mail you tomorrow after my dreaded appointment.

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  3. You do just that...whatever you feel like doing, and forget thinking about it. Enjoy life. Don't worry, be happy. Breathe.

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