Thursday, October 6, 2011

8 weeks old. Her crying makes me soft.

Emma is 8 weeks old and I weigh 182 lb (down 2 lb since we started the diet last week).
Yesterday I was hungry and cranky, and I bet Emma is picking up on that a bit, because she just had a lot of cramps and was cranky herself.  We had a nice bath in the big tub, and she splashed around with her little legs, but as soon as I took her out of the water she started crying, and worked herself up into a hysterical mode.  I soothed her as best as I could, but she did not want the boob (that is a first for Emma!) and at one point I had to get dried up and dressed myself, as I had just gotten out of the tub with her.  After dressing her warmly I put her on the floor of my walk in closet, where I was getting dressed, and she started crying very angry, and thrashing around with her little legs and arms, and I felt so bad that I just had to get dried up and dressed, and could not pick her up.  She was just lying there, helpless, and my heart really melted out of compassion for this little body that cannot do a single thing for herself and is so incredibly dependent.  I cannot imagine the frustration!  Good thing she doesn't know any better...  

There was another magical moment last night, when she grabbed her daddy's finger, looked at it, then tentatively stuck out her little tongue and slowly brought her head to the finger (instead of the other way around :) and first tasted it, then started chewing on his knuckle.  It was so sweet to see her explore.  I am used to her playing with my boob, chewing on it, grabbing it with her hands, checking it out with her tongue, whenever she is not hungry and feels like having fun.  But I have never seen her doing it with anything other than my boob or her hands, so this was definitely a first.

As for my own progress, which I will probably post every Thursday, I am doing well...except for the irritability :( which hopefully will get better.  I feel tense, probably because all I can think about is how to get my hands on more food, so I can't concentrate on anything else.  I have good results though.  Down 2 lb, and stronger in the core exercises (I can now do the plank for one minute, while just one week ago I had to struggle for 30 seconds).  I can even do it on one leg at a time, for 10 seconds each.  I just got my gymboss interval timer, and my workouts have gotten harder, since the timer beeps each time when I have to increase the intensity, and measures out my breaks.  I use it for everything, including the elliptical workouts, which I do 50 sec hard, 10 sec break, repeat times 20.  Yesterday the sweat was pouring off me like rain.

I like interval training, it is way less boring than regular 20 min of elliptical at the same pace.  The other way to spice up training is to get some new and exciting exercise clothes.  I just splurged and treated myself to some lululemon pants and jacket (the thin one that matches the pants in both colour and material, like a track suit), two bras (identical black v-neck) and one white hoodie.  My bank account is groaning in pain.  But I need some comfy exercise clothes, and I stick to that excuse.

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