I am writing these blog posts as much for me and for the others, as well as for Emma, I want her to have it when she grows up in case she cares. I am also going to make a video of her making a fuss with the feedings so that I can play it at her wedding. She is so incredibly cute, making little angry kitten sounds and hitting me with her fists, bobbing her head into my breast, etc. Last night we had a 45 min episode of trying to latch over and over again, and I enjoyed it immensely to see how much more relaxed we both are about this difficulty we are having. I am laughing at her and talking to her, and she cries and "talks" to me back, in a sort of upset and pissed off fashion that I find hilarious, and happen to think would make very good wedding material later on. In any case, today she latched on flawlessly the entire day, and other than last night the rest of the time was spent in a way that really gives me hope that breastfeeding might possibly be pleasant after all.
Before I had Emma, in my last trimester, I was reading a lot of books on cosleeping versus crib sleeping, and of course know all the rules about avoiding SIDS, such as always put them to sleep on their back, sleep with them in your room until about 6 months, but preferably not on the same bed, avoid pillows and blankets that might suffocate them, etc. I was so paranoid when I brought her home that the first morning when I woke up I was half expecting to find her not breathing and suffocated by some pillow or other unknown danger in my bed. We have a queen size bed, and I lay her to sleep with us, as we still don't have a crib or a bassinet. Actually, the reason I do it is not that, it is because I cannot bear to be separated from her little body for so long. I think I am going to cry when she will demand to sleep in her own bed at the age of 20. Just kidding.
Anyway, so my habit is to lay her on my side of the bed, and then MrH and I try to squeeze ourselves on his half. Just so that I don't accidentally roll over her or something. Well, last night was different. I gave her to MrH to put her to sleep, as he likes to chat with her and kiss her and generally adore her from head to toe before bedtime. When she fell asleep, he wrapped her up and put her to bed... on her stomach! I nearly fainted. I told him about all the books on SIDS and the fact that putting baby to sleep prone is anathema, and he shrugged and said that all his previous kids slept on their tummies all the time, and that if she is comfortable there is no reason to panic about it. She had bad stomach cramps as her stools are becoming poopy, instead of meconium, and I must say that the stomach sleeping helped her with the cramps. Of course I looked at MrH crooked and I said "you do realize that I am going to be awake all night watching her breathing if you do that" and he informed me casually "that's your problem". That is when I talked to him about my fear of the pillows and blankets and all dangers lurking in our bed, and he said two things that absolutely made sense: one is that she needs a very small amount of oxygen, so even if our very light comforter falls over her face she will still have lots of oxygen left to breathe. The second thing is that if something bothers her, she will move and I will notice. Both of those things made sense to me, and I relaxed instantly about the whole blanket/pillow/rolling over her thing. Which lead to an excellent night's sleep for everybody: she slept with her head right between my breasts, and breastfed while I dozed off, she was nicely warm (for the first time she had warm hands when I slept with her glued to my body), and MrH had lots of room to sleep like a normal person. And we all woke up happy. Except, of course, I turned her on her side as soon as MrH started snoring. Hehehe (insert evil laugh).