Friday, October 1, 2010

advice-have you tried...

In a well meaning attempt to help, people come up with the most funny suggestions.  In three years of infertility, I have heard a lot of them.  Some upsetting, such as "maybe you should pray more"(how do you know I don't pray a lot, mom?).  Some intriguing, such as "perhaps you should go to Siberia, there is a monastery there, everybody who went got pregnant" (thanks dad!  I wonder about those monks, what miracles they perform ;).  Some cute, such as having to wear a moonstone bracelet which needs to be rinsed in cold water and kept under a full moon at night to activate the crystals (hope they're not radioactive, that's all I say).  But the top prize goes to the very interesting suggestion that I should get DEWORMED, since worms might cause miscarriages by sucking the lifeforce out of me.  Scary indeed.  I haven't gotten around to deworming myself yet, but it is definitely on my to do list for 2029.

The thing is, dear friends, there is an endless array of theories out there.  Anybody who gets high can come up with a theory which might accidentally make its way into Chatelaine or Formula As (that's a Romanian magazine full of how to advice, mostly the odd kind).  That does not mean that we must try everything.

 I have tried a large amount of complementary treatments, as you can read in my first post, and nothing worked.  It is time to hand myself in to fate.  If a theory is exceptionally good, AND it gets published in the Fertility and Sterility, I will try it.  Until then, if you want to say you care about me and want to help me but don't know how, just say it.  It will make more sense to both of us.  Because I know that behind the helpful theories, that is exactly what you mean.  And I love it!

1 comment:

  1. You're right. It is true that, even though it is painful to accept, sometimes there is nothing one can do to help, in a practical way that is. But like you said admitting your limits doesn't mean you've failed to help. But it does mean that you've thought about helping and if you could you would because you care. And sending that message is soothing to the person who is suffering.