Monday, May 21, 2012


I have spent the weekend researching gestational surrogacy in India.  It is very tempting.  To carry another pregnancy, I would have to have the TAC replaced again, this time by dr. Haney, at 25000 USD expense out of pocket.  I would not go for anybody else doing it, because unfortunately my previous cerclage was placed a bit too high and eroded into the body of the uterus, so now a repeat cerclage needs to be very accurately placed.  Nor am I a candidate for TAC during pregnancy, again because of the need for accuracy of placement.  These are things that dr. Haney emailed me.  I need to talk to him on the phone.

Unfortunately, with the repeated D&C's that I had after my hemorrhage, I might not even get pregnant, and end up spending all this money (and another surgery, I lost track by now) for nothing.  While a surrogate in India would likely get pregnant and carry the baby to term with most likely no fuss and no complications with the same embryos that my body might fail.

I have thought long and hard about which way to go.  I am still mulling it over, but I think I am going to go for the repeat TAC this summer, and pursue another IVF sometime in December, if my cycle returns and I am not still breastfeeding.  I would miss the embryo and later on the fetus, with all that distance to India!  to spend a whole pregnancy apart from my own fetus is very difficult.

But it is honestly a good option for me.  If all else fails, I know there is this option as well.  It would cost about the same as the TAC plus another IVF fresh cycle.

TAC cost 25000
IVF fresh 12000 (with ICSI)
total 37000

Surrogacy with IVF/ICSI and travel :  35000 according to a bunch of blogs.

Very tempting...
Repeat cerclage... not so tempting... how many more surgeries do I have to go through?

I oscillate between one option and the other with the speed of a bumble bee.  I need to sleep for about one month on this before I can say I made up my mind fully.  In the meantime, I want to enjoy Emma.


  1. That's a huge choice to make. I'm amazed at the opportunities you actually have to build your family these days. But the cost on the other hand is really appalling!

  2. That's such a big decision! I'd be going back and forth on it like crazy as well.

  3. I know you have been emailing Dr.H however have you spoken to Dr.D in NJ? He has a payment plan for international and no insurance patients. He is one of the "pioneers" along with Dr.H . Which ever you decide im sure you would have done all the research. Wishing you well on this possible journey.

  4. Such a difficult decision, I hear you on thinking back and forth on how to move forward in family building. It's so difficult! Thinking of you guys as you mull this over and hoping you land on the decision that you feel most at peace with

  5. Wow...I am seriously in awe of your dedication of wanting to enlarge your family. More surgeries vs. a baby gestating elsewhere. The cost alone would be a detraction to most, you are seriously amazing!

    Whatever you decide, Emma and any future sibling will be lucky to have one brave mama.

    p.s. what a story to tell any future child, that they were gestated in India!!!

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