Sunday, April 14, 2013

update from New Town

We have moved.  It was difficult, but not as difficult as I had initially anticipated.  The new house is bigger, and a lot newer, which is a pleasure.  I am also enjoying discovering our new town, which is even further North and colder, but smaller and friendlier.  Work is quite enjoyable as well, but of course I miss my old patients and especially I miss my friends.  Overall, other than losing my dehydrator and the paddle attachment of the Kitchen aid ice cream maker (which I have only found out today after I had already made the ice cream mixture), all seems to be in order in this new environment of ours.

I have to stop breastfeeding Emma soon.  I really don't know how to do it.  She is all over my boobs all the time.  In the mornings, when she is half asleep, she sucks for about half an hour at a time.  She enjoys it so much, and it helps her calm down and feel cuddled and warm, which is why I am so reluctant to stop it.  It feels like I would be rejecting her, although, as my psychologist used to say years ago, there is a difference between refusal and rejection.  I am refusing her the breast, true, but I am not rejecting her, and I love her just as much.

The problem is that I don't really know how to comfortably deal with Emma's anger outbursts.  She has a mind of her own by now, and if I make her angry, I am in trouble.  She can cry and throw herself on the floor and make a scene for a good hour at a time, and it is very hard impossible to distract her at this time.  I miss the volatile mind of the young toddler, who can be bought shamelessly with a cookie.  At this age, it takes an elephant to distract them.

Any advice from the rest of you who have been there and survived is greatly appreciated.  That is, if anybody still reads my blog.


  1. Great hearing that all is well in the new town. Loving her but being firm is what you need to do. It is important to make sure that you are really listening to what she is trying to say - remember that her mind is ahead of her ability to speak...

  2. My best advice for weaning is to take it slow -- as slow as you need to. I allowed about 1-2 weeks between each dropped session, going by G's lead. The two daytime sessions were easiest, and I think I may have ended up weaning him off both of those within a week. He doesn't usually want milk at all before bed now, but now I feel like we're having to come up with a new routine to get G to relax befor bed. I decided to leave the morning session for last because he went hysterical if he didn't get to nurse right away.

    I was sad whenever I realized "this will be my last time doing this" when it was time to drop another feeding. It can be just as emotional and hard for the mom too, I think.

    There's be tantrums since weaning messed with G's routine, but it seemed to help if I carried him around the kitchen so he could see exactly was I was doing to prepare his sippy cup of milk. Now he may be upset but as soon as he sees me take out the sippy cup, he starts calming down :) There's been a lot of trying to explain I know a sippy cup of milk isn't the same and it's not what he'd like to have, even though I'm not 100% sure he understands me. I figure at some point he will, but I won't know when that moment will be, so I do my best to put myself in his shoes and explain I know how he feels and why I am doing something that makes him mad.

    Now G likes to stick his hands down my shirt and grab my boobs to help him feel comforted (he mostly does this when he's upset or really tired). I don't mind so much when we're at home, but I don't want that happening in public :) So, once I am confident he is okay with no more boob and some of the tantrums die, I'll have to start putting a stop to that. He's also been super cuddly since we started weaning, which is awesome because he has NEVER been cuddly with me -- even as a newborn.

  3. i haven't come to your blog for a bit now! WOW so many new things....I'm curious where you moved too! Francis is 10months and still feeding and I find it a tad odd when she comes over to me and reaches for the boob as I"m naked and drying my hair. I feel sometimes like a bit of a heffer! LOL...Anyhow I so love the breast feeding myself so much that I'm curious when we'll decide to wean out the breast feeding. Francis really has no incling to quit. Now I know emma is a bit older than Francis but still I'm curious how long she'll go for and when I'll be ready to stop too.....such a beautiful bonding time. love it! K hope alls well in your new place....cheers julie