Sunday, April 14, 2013

update from New Town

We have moved.  It was difficult, but not as difficult as I had initially anticipated.  The new house is bigger, and a lot newer, which is a pleasure.  I am also enjoying discovering our new town, which is even further North and colder, but smaller and friendlier.  Work is quite enjoyable as well, but of course I miss my old patients and especially I miss my friends.  Overall, other than losing my dehydrator and the paddle attachment of the Kitchen aid ice cream maker (which I have only found out today after I had already made the ice cream mixture), all seems to be in order in this new environment of ours.

I have to stop breastfeeding Emma soon.  I really don't know how to do it.  She is all over my boobs all the time.  In the mornings, when she is half asleep, she sucks for about half an hour at a time.  She enjoys it so much, and it helps her calm down and feel cuddled and warm, which is why I am so reluctant to stop it.  It feels like I would be rejecting her, although, as my psychologist used to say years ago, there is a difference between refusal and rejection.  I am refusing her the breast, true, but I am not rejecting her, and I love her just as much.

The problem is that I don't really know how to comfortably deal with Emma's anger outbursts.  She has a mind of her own by now, and if I make her angry, I am in trouble.  She can cry and throw herself on the floor and make a scene for a good hour at a time, and it is very hard impossible to distract her at this time.  I miss the volatile mind of the young toddler, who can be bought shamelessly with a cookie.  At this age, it takes an elephant to distract them.

Any advice from the rest of you who have been there and survived is greatly appreciated.  That is, if anybody still reads my blog.